So after my seconf time of cutting, i started to realise that it was an easy way of realsing all that anger i'd been building up and began seeing that it was the only way out and i stopped being able to see a future for myself. But in my solitude i began to start becoming more focused on just passing my GCSEs and proving to people that i was good at something, even though i'd been playing rubgy for the last 4 years i never felt that i was good enough even though i got trials for county twice, and as i had began cutting myself i withdrew from rugby and now i realise that rugby had been my outlet for anger for the last year or so.
And after getting A* and A's in most of my year 10 exams i realised that it was worth living as i could get a good job to then earn aload of money and get married and have kids, but that aspect of my live seemed so far away and unachievable most of the time. But i grasped this glimmer of hope in all the darkness that surrounded and i shortly i found myself in a new group of friends that all understood what i had been through and i realised that both boys and girls had been through the same as me and they started inviting me out to things which helped keep my mind off cutting myself, and they saved my lifee, and will do a couple more times, but in a lot less serious situations...
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